i don't wanna be a millionnaire... and it's not that bad~

just got this in the school mail. 

Dear Graduating Students,

You have heard that this year will be a depressing year for the economy, and this could mean less opportunity for the graduating Class of 2012. To assist our students, the Faculty is working with the NUS Career Centre (NCC) for a series of activities to help you “Jump Start” your job search efforts.

ironically, the fonts got smaller at the end of the sentence. i wonder if it were intentional, as if to represent the decrease in confidence of the uni in dispatching its graduating students into the working world. 

oh well... 

i'm just going to enjoy my last sem with my crazy modules, and that's that! i had enough of people asking me whether i want to do honours or why i don't want to do honours even though i meet the criteria. this has become my model answer (after what seems like a trillion times of questioning): i know i'm not into math research, and i know i want to work with people and not just numbers. 

and for me, career's just "not about the money, money, money". 

aggression and weird moods aside- the bottom line is, i believe God will eventually bring me to where i'm meant to be. and i do believe in taking the road less travelled. because i know i'm made to take a unique path. and there's something screaming inside of me that wants everyone else not to make me conform into a 'cookie cutter' stereotypical life of an applied math graduate (which does sound kinda boring if i have to admit). 


some more important updates: 

1) tutee has applied for school of choices. thank God she's keen on keeping in touch, despite the grades she didn't expect to get for the subjects she had extra help for. (in other words, she did badly.) but thank God for understanding parents, and thank God that her amazing math saved her from getting 20 and above for her L1R5. i'm still in the midst of thinking of a good christian community to integrate her in because she's interested to know more about Jesus. 

2) started a bible study with jia ching and my sister. doing a book recommended by cynthia, called "the search for significance". made them write an oath of promise/pledge to keep their commitment. thank God for these 2 girls. they have grown so much over the years and i can only thank God for the progress they have been making spiritually- wanting to know God more and wanting to spend time with like-minded believers. God to be praised!

3) i planned to make myself useful in january by blessing my friends before the sem progresses and before i start going insane. one of my new year resolutions is to cook for my family at least once a month. and for each of my friends who mean alot to me- at least once in the whole year. looks like i may finish accomplishing it within the first month. 555+++

4) i spent the last 3 days thinking, crying when i had the tears to, and reflecting over and on all the annoyances, mistakes and regrets that i had about myself and what i could have done better, and sometimes what i thought others could have done better too. theme verse helped for the annoyances caused by other people. thinking about my own mistakes helped me to realise that God was the one who would always be there to catch me when i make a blunder. He would usually let me make the mistake anyway, because He knows it's how i learn best. [for your discretion: it doesn't work that way all the time- there're just some mistakes you have to decide that you don't want to make in the first place because irreversibility of that mistake may be higher.]

it's not going to be easy growing up in a church that's going to contain a generation of gradually more rebellious and educated youths (sorry young readers, it's true). i realised that the time when "the good ones" end up rebelling is when parents or mentors become overcontrolling and refuse to let them make their own mistakes. so we can either give them space now, or they'll find their own somewhere else.


5) aunty yoke lin just passed away, a few days after a blood clot was removed from the brain. it was the first case of euthanasia that i've personally come in contact with. such a controversial issue can only be dealt with at the family level and how they decide when to let the family member go. but the assurance is that, while all the legal talk is going on here on earth, the family member is enjoying the eternal glorious presence of God...








alright, that's all for today. shall rush assignments.